Ringing All Through the Store

My weekend thus far:

Friday night I felt restless, and insecure, so I made my way through the nearly subzero , devilish temperature to go to The Bar, in the hopes of securing some kind of conversation with some sort of friend. Unfortunately no one I knew seemed to be out and about, and The Bar quickly filled up with douche bags, and I found myself alone at a booth, sitting with a pile of coats on either side of me.

The standing people around me hungrily eyed my seating real estate, waiting for me to leave, and I could feel that, yet I had no where else to sit. So I stayed there anyway, watching people converse with each other.

I felt like those coats, almost abandoned and owner-less, empty on the seat cushions.

So I left before 11:30 and went back home and wrote fevered, sad poetry hoping to turn it into song, and drank a bottle of one of my favorite beers, the Australian Sheaf Stout. I also tried to make myself cry, but I couldn't.

Emotions were very out of whack that night. And I'm glad I didn't get on this thing to drunk blog (drog?) about it, cause it would have been ugly. Trust me.

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Saturday morning I ventured out early to go, finally, to the local Kiwanis thrift sale, which is by far one of the best thrifting experiences one can have in this town. Unfortunately it is only open Saturday mornings for four hours, which I usually work on Saturdays, and am usually too hungover despite this fact.

Though I have no idea what Kiwanis stands for ideologically, I noticed that it is run mainly by very old people. They also seem to have a fondness for not paying attention to the low, low prices, and they welcome good old fashioned haggling, which is rad. I really enjoyed the man who mans the loud speaker, making amazing announcements all morning long. I wish to record them somehow.

I purchased a Sony "Sound Rider" cassette player for the purposes of using the built in microphone for home recording on cassette tapes (ala early Mountain Goats. All hail the Lo-Fi!). I haven't quite entered the digital age. So now I can actually record myself playing music, which I attempted and found myself very nervous for some reason that I couldn't play well even though it was only me in my room, and that my voice still totally sounds alien to me when I listen to it on recordings, which I've known that fact for years, but it still gets me all weirded out.

Soon I will figure out a way to record songs onto Magnus, and thus I will post them somewhere on the interweb for other people to hear. Still working on this.

Also bought a new sweater with red and brown strips, and a little eagle over my heart, which I'm wearing now, though it is a little itchy on the skin. I like it anyway. This is also probably the first article of clothing I've bought for myself in some time, as I do not currently have a fashion adviser, i.e. girlfriend that tells me what to where.

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Later that night I contemplated going out again, but really the sub-zero temps made going out seem like a foolish endeavor, so I stayed home with a nice bottle of red wine, and zoned out to video games for most of the night.

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Today I woke up feeling marginally better about the state of my life, which I'll admit I'm still having troubles now and again, emotional dips, and feelings of insecurity. I made coffee and learned three Mountain Goats songs that I have been meaning to figure out for quite some time now. (Store, Attention All Pickpockets, and Noctifer Birmingham, which are among the list of my many, many, upon many favorites)

Also got my usual Sunday breakfast of Bee Bim Bop at the little deli, with a side of Kim Chee. And purchased a brand new notebook for the purpose of journaling and random thoughts and lyrics. My old notebook has just about filled up and I'm ready for a new notebook. Something about a fresh, clean notebook, almost a holy feeling. That is until I muck it up with details of my humdrum existence.

Speaking of holy, hopefully tonight I will be going to "Church" which is an old tradition my friends and I had, of getting together on a Sunday evening, cooking dinner, and drinking and playing songs for each other on the guitar til late at night.

Its been years since I've attended, and I miss it dearly, oh Prodigal Son that I am.

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I think I'm doing all right for this weekend on the whole. Its been so long since I've had two whole days off in a row, and to myself, I almost didn't know what to do with this magical time.