Tickle Me Fancied

Yesterday was perhaps the laziest of lazy days I've had in a long time. I think I picked the right day, because the morning rain turned itself into evening blizzard, and didn't stop until late at night, and yet again we find ourselves covered in snow.

And today, a surprise text invite to go for a walk with the object of my affection, as she went to the bank on her break. Sigh. We walked through slush and intense sunshine, though its still undeniably cold, too cold, and then witnessed a slight fender bender between two very large construction trucks, the loudest crash that shook both of us for a few seconds.

...

I've been thinking and rethinking this whole situation through and through. Because that's what I do, I over-analyze everything, most especially matters of the heart.

My roommate grilled me on it last night, asking me why I'm going so strong for this relationship, the one that is doomed, almost suicidal, she said.

Perhaps it is safe. So safe. One day very soon she will be gone, or at least moved on to somewhere else. No unexpected endings, no major let-downs, and none of the "forever" question bs. that tends to find its way into most relationship talks or thoughts.

We have this limited amount of time. How are we going to use it with the best of our abilities? I mean, every relationship is limited in time, just over different lengths; rest of our lives? two years? One month?

I don't know. All I know is, is that it feels so damn good to feel excited by a girl again. Not to be endlessly lamenting the loss of a potential marriage that I wasn't 100% sure should have happened in the first place.

She's wicked hot, we can talk for hours about from nothing at all to the great themes of life, we seem to be in such the same place and position in life, making out is way fun, and she likes me and I like her. I would very much like to enjoy her company for the time we have left.

I'm not concerned with the ending. All relationships end sooner or later. I've dwelt too much on endings.

...

I stepped into the bathroom and noticed nothing. Nothing. No black ants combing the walls, inspecting the strange, black trap where my mouthwash used to reside, no ants on the sink, no ants on the walls, in the bathtub, all over...

For two days the bathroom has been strangely silent.

Perhaps the cheap-ass traps I bought have worked their magic. Maybe my upstairs neighbors have more mouthwash than I do, I'm currently out, and the ants have moved up there.

Or perhaps they're amassing their armies for the final, shock-and-awe invasion I'll wake up to, tomorrow morning.

I am quite getting used to showering with their dead carcasses floating around my feet in the bathtub. Sometimes its fun to splash them with water.

...

And tonight I will be seeing my friend's burlesque troop perform. It shall be quite fun. Once i find some info on their troop, I'll post a link so y'all can check them out. And it is a tasteful show, as tasteful as burlesque can be.

...

And I ran the mustache idea by the girl the other night, and it looks like I just might have to wait until she is gone. Something she said about mustaches being "terrifying and disgustingly gross."

I do agree with these sentiments.

But I'm going to do it anyway. Well, in a month, anyway.